Thika Road Madness

Has anyone ever paid attention to the road signs at that point on Thika Road right next to Mathare? Anyone? No?

Well, let me educate you a little. The next time you pass there, analyze. It seems like a most strenuous job to ask of the average Kenyan commuter, but judging from all the brilliant minds (and the opposite too) I’ve seen on twirra over the years, I can bet it’s the Nairobi commuter’s fav past-time – critique. Well, straight to the point, there’s a sharp precipice over which cars may fall over if driven recklessly, which seems to be a Kenyan profession. So logically, there must be this sign, or something like it:

they aren't really this graphic, but you get it.

Problem is, these specific ones have a certain sadist twist to them…though I think it takes a sadist to see it…and there I go calling myself names. My conclusion as you might see is that these signs were drawn up by the nearby inmates. Or why else would the signs themselves be planted in a sequence? Pay close attention as you pass them, you may note that the first sign you pass shows a car…let’s say a Probox(I know, I know, we all hate that car!) The car has both it’s rear wheels…and approximately half of its body fully grounded, with only it’s bonnet being subjected to gravity’s omnipotent whims.

The next one…surprisingly, the Probox has moved distinctly forward…almost there. The Next: the two rear wheels are barely touching the ground.

You can guess what the subsequent sign shows…if you doubt me, be my guest (or China Wu Yi’s, I heard they cook a mean dog stew.)

I can imagine the homicidal delight of that unfortunate bugger within Mathare’s confines, who was only innocently practising his long-lost Art and Craft skills from primary school years ( Am I the only one who failed that class… MISERABLY?)

Though i bet the only reason it even got the doctor’s nod was one subtle detail: Did you notice there’s no driver in the picture? Yeah, i thought so too…that would be wee bit suggestive. So I suppose the guy’s in recovery…or has a severe case of dementia and doesn’t believe in the existence of man…or has a severe phobia of Probox drivers..though I think that would be a quite healthy ailment, vital for national development. #DeathToTheProbox!




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